Taunting Neo-Nazis for fun and profit

I know, technically they’re just Nazis, not Neo-Nazis, but details…

Colonel Buckshot is seriously upset that someone has badmouthed the hilariously nutty Christian Identity Movement in the States.  Gosh, why would anyone think those guys might be crazy?

Cumbrian ‘Patriots’: “Cumbria is better than the South West because it has less dark people”, or words to that effect.

Derby Patriot: it’s amazing how they’ve trained that poor beast. I am, of course, referring to Shaydee_Lady, who is apparently easily amused by anything which is vaguely downputting of Obama.

Sarah Maid of Albion: “I actually don’t understand US law at all. Oh well, I can just make it up, instead.”

The Green Arrow: “The Turko-Islamic horde is poised to overrun us, and when they do, we will all be forced to eat kebabs and watch belly-dancers.  AAAEEEEEEEEEEIIII!”

Up Pompeii: “Being tortured is just another ingenius jihadist plot to overthrow the West.”

You know, I lament the often ill-formatted and grammatically incorrect rantings of the British fascist blogosphere.  Sadly, No! doesn’t have to put up with this sort of shoddy nonsense.  Their targets practically write the jokes themselves, in clear and easily intelligible English.

Read Full Post »

Nick Clegg, valiant defender of Democracy™

I’m not sure Nick Clegg quite understands this representative democracy business.  Let me explain:

Some people out there, who we will refer to as “me”, don’t like Labour or the Tories very much.  Therefore, we vote against them, usually for another party who we think supports our interests better and opposes those two parties.

When, therefore, one party states it intends to support another party, even in an unlikely (if endlessly debated and theorized) scenario, it actually kind of removes any incentive to vote for them, because they are making it clear they will not support the interests of their voters, because, ultimately, either the Labour or Tory party will be dictating policy.

Hurrah!  Government by The People, for The People!  And freedom!  And a puppy!

Read Full Post »

This politics thing is easier than it looks

So apparently, the party formerly known as Bush’s Cheerleaders has come out with a new statement of principles, since they’re evidently not yet bored of purging the ranks.

However, they have convinced me to throw my hat into the ring, and form my own political party, with my own, superior statement of principles.  Because naturally, anything they can do, I can do better:

1.  We support smaller government through mandated Russian Roulette games for all political seats and, if killed, the politician replaced by a blow-up sexdoll.  All lobbyists will also be thrown down a cliff, then laughed at.

2.  We support abusing Canada’s government-run health care, and will bus American citizens over the border to be treated.

3.  We support market based energy reform, such as hiring Blackwater to slash the tires of every energy company who doesn’t do as we say.

4.  We support the worker’s right to go crazy and whack their supervisor, if they feel like it.

5.  We support the expulsion of all illegal immigrants to America, their children, their children’s children, their children’s children children etc etc ad infinitum.  Zero tolerance.

6.  We support victory in Iraq and Afghanistan by declaring we have won, then withdrawing sneakily so the terrorists cannot follow us home.

7.  We support the containment of Iran and North Korea via the construction of a giant, space-based weapons platform, which we call a “Death Star”.  Dick Cheney will be the commanding officer.

8.  We support the Defense of Marriage even more, by restricting marriage to white, hetrosexual twenty-somethings, and making divorce punishable by being hung until you are sorry dead.

9.  We support death panels so long as it makes Sarah Palin do more hilarious freakouts.

10.  We support the right of every child in America to own one depleted uranium shell.

Read Full Post »